Much like boiling your entire personality down into a color or series of letters, fitting your relationship into one of four tidy categories has intuitive appeal. Our relationships and psychological experiences are complex in a way that defies basic categories or groups; every relationship cannot fit neatly within these four categories.However, they provide one framework for understanding how relationships progress. Importantly, knowing how commitment to wed changed over time was a better predictor of relationship outcomes than the basic measure of relationship quality at the first interview.
The interviewer plotted key dates, noting where the likelihood of marriage changed, for better or worse.
) and decided to get back into the world of dating.
One thing that struck me very early on in my forays was that everyone had an opinion about “what worked” in terms of dating.
For example, spending too much time with friends, fighting or just being too different could nudge commitment to wed down.
Conversely, meeting the partner’s family, spending a lot of time together, having a lot in common and receiving positive feedback from friends or family could make commitment to wed rise.